THE SECRET LIFE OF PETS 2 MOVIE REVIEW – Double Toasted Reviews



secret life of pets – you know this is the one where everybody was nervous they say is this my word max is gonna ask permission to pull his penis out in front of you mind if I just masturbate in front of your Gidget real quick what's up sure wait what of course we're talking about this because of louis c.k doing the voice of max the dog and we all know the scandal behind what happened louis c.k if you don't go look at it look it up for yourself details with all louis c.k projects they found a way around this they found a way around this one because of course being that as voices they can replace the voice actor and with this one they replacing Louie CK with a pen a lost dog right there repent Oswalt they breed they replace him with him and and people are wondering like wow man you know salon can't be crazy but louis c.k he he made max for me I'm the only person you know just say max no Louis so can people people get with this new max and all depends on the story right it all depends on what these pets are doing this time as Martha I'm covering a lot more secrets these animals do what humans ain't looking well let's go ahead and take a look F at the building nuclear bomb yes down eros yeah it's like it's like John wick with animals they just got a secret organization of animal assassins Isis its murdered people get rid of the bodies so let's go and take a look at the trailer for the secret life of pets too and we'll be back with our review marty-mart hates those those those minions you should have seen in the beginning when we watch the movie Kyle sitting next to you when illumination came up Martin turned into a dog look down boy you want to join me [Applause] okay this is gonna it's gonna sound probably look crazy about me to say then just to say this because uh this movie's weird and I know that look I know that's weird to say itself consider never watching a movie with talking dogs and guinea pigs or little cars and rabbits dressing up like superheroes I know that to say that that that is weird itself but goddamn it these animals all they're all over the place in this movie all over the place is a good way to describe this and I'm not saying it's a good thing or a bad thing I'm just saying that it's it's they are all over the place because I'm gonna tell you the movie starts out pretty straightforward very grounded yeah actually it does um it establishes its thesis and tell you what its gonna be about oh yeah yeah because here it does because you know when the movie starts out max max is talking to you about his boy about the about his kid because you know max live with his with his pet human woman and it was just the two of them this time and in this film well his uh his pet is breeding now his owner has met a guy they uh you know they go through time really quick they have a child and Max is talking about how you know he's he's all about his his kid that's my boy I mean he gives a bunch of speeches it almost was kinda like you me huh you know you almost wanna say max right look I'm tired of hearing about your kid all right yeah he's he's talking a lot about yeah about Parenthood about yeah of him parenting this human Chaka how all it changes you he's showing you pictures of the kid showing you videos like alright max he won't shut up about yeah and I wanna hit about you know more congratulations yeah okay sure a movie about a boy and his dog yeah exact all gonna spoil this is gonna be fun it up it is predictable you think you say all right now I got this it's gonna be about Max and Max it's just gonna be it's gonna be one running joke about how max has to protect this kid when the parents ain't really doing that job that's lacking we don't give these animals enough credit for saving our kids if we didn't have pets all our children would not yeah all my children would be run over by trucks and be like it ma'am it would be like Pet Sematary yes every kid would just be out in the middle of the street dying and that's what you think is gonna be about until Harrison Ford as a dog named rooster comes in and says you know what that kid oh hello I didn't know this was your fault it's got my name on the side mr. chicken name's not chicken no I look like a chicken big hit Bob with Harrison Ford he's really mad yeah got the perfect for this just just somebody who's just grumpy all the time that's Harrison Ford like that's not him as that dog that is here's a fork god damn it can't you see my name in a script such as a chicken so then your kids up a tree what's the problem it gets hurt he learns not to do it again you know how many electric cords I chew one it shocked me I walk backward for a week but I never chewed a cord again that is Harrison Ford talking about [Laughter] Harrison Ford yes the same here man I said okay Liam needs to kind of dish the accent he's doing a country thing with this and I heard it was Harrison Ford and really man once you hear it yeah now you know yeah but but I could not tell who was before I really loved that character yeah me too once they get to this farm then you start to realize what this is truly about it's funny because they say it's all about this kid and they don't dad that kid is gone like that dog says and that kid does not come back and that gotta be fine fuck and a camera crew it well I actually kind of like it better known as three stories because it's the secret life of pets what are these animals doing when nobody's around so it's not Max's story and I kind of like that they split from Max and you get you get three different stories here it's almost like someone's like a the pulp fiction of talking animal movies because it comes back to one it all comes back to one conclusion I sell fictional animal stories and it is these three stories are taking place and they all come back together like all the characters split up they do that thing and they all come back together for one conclusion right there now at least I didn't say pup fiction say it I said you could have been more looking at me like this say it again a day but the the first story is what you saw right there it's max and Duke who go to the farm and that's actually my favorite one is you know it's kind of random comes out of nowhere but it's simple yeah it's pretty straightforward I really like that man I like the simplicity of that it's just them learning how to be you know country dogs especially a max you know that it's just rooster teaching him how to go out there and be brave and help him with the farm work keeping animals in life all right now it gets much weirder after that no not a whole lot weirder for the second one the second one I get because they're playing off of you know that I plan off of some things that we're familiar with second one has to deal with Gidget who is protecting Max's toy she loses it in an apartment of the crazy cat lady of course she has an apartment full of cats so she kind of has to learn how to be a cat to infiltrate and go in there because it's a houseful it's crazy feral cats yeah like the turn of the friend they go eat that woman yeah it's all done yeah they have gang wars inside uh-huh in a very minute oh let me see something new they want that ball it's the Thunderdome of cats but it really is it's a cult in there in and then the third one is where it where they just stop giving a fuck the third one was bullshit their third one yeah I know I should wait but the third one's bullshit no that was the one where it's the weirdest one but the moat but it's it's funny because it's weird and yet so typical of an animated CG family sequel yes of a we're just gonna throw a bunch of ideas together and none of make sense now uh in this one you have snowball whose voice bites the rabbit is voiced by Kevin Hart and it's funny because snowball is for some reason they don't explain is known to other animals as a superhero who by the way doesn't know what an inside voice is let me tell you something anybody comes ahead looking for trouble or they gonna meet my partners I'm talking about Paul in order hey you know the neighbors like I'm gonna then boil this son of a bitch he Muhammad but that's this is crazy that's the one where a dog on a plane sees that there is an abused rare white Siberian Siberian tiger so she figures the who who's on by the way by the circus owner who is also Russian and drapes dresses like a pimp and she decides that okay I need to buy this is just a random dog on a plane yeah she decides that we need to figure out how to save this poor animal I need to go find the great captain snowball who of course they don't know that in and not appreciate the job they don't know that this that this rabbit here named snowball is actually captain snowball and the dog is named Daisy was voiced by Tiffany Haddish any of you know captain snowball yes we do a poor defenseless animal needs saving okay I got to get to do to get to stuff to do things it's gonna get way weirder in you ain't life I will say she did warning if that was if you don't think it get any weirder than that it does it gets it gets completely weird and that's my least favorite story but I do have to say man I I you know me I'm not I don't like when they get sassy black women to play sassy black women and voice funny animals and CG movies but Tiffany Haddish is adorable as that dog man that voice fit for me it that actually worked I actually love that I can see that dog and see that voice Tiffany Haddish you come out on stage dressed like that except she doesn't show I actually loved I loved that dog I wish they could have done more with it because the third story as I said is my least favorite because it feels like it feels like a sequel and any kind instinct you know the ones where they just kind of force to do a sequel so we got to get a generic villain and it's not unusual to get a story where oh we got a rescue a rare endangered animal shit that was the that was the the plot to show dogs Oh max I'm an undercover cop working a kidnapping case a baby panda was stolen and their you know show dogs that was show dog that was so dogs yeah gonna remember yeah man dad yeah that one is it just feels like it is the completely the most random and not in a good way and the one that was uh and and the one that was the laziest yeah and they were just throwing concepts in there oh yeah now they're not as they're being chased by wolves and then and the circus owner dresses like a witch anything guns on animals and abuses his clowns and just as this one tiger and and somehow the tiger is not fighting back but I don't know yeah it was it was too much every time that one came on I staked out yeah yeah that one and it's not like I even hated it it's just that that's the one where you guys just didn't bother to flesh that out you just didn't bother to really do anything with it it's the one I just didn't make the most sense because you didn't even try to make it make sense with the story we just needed this what we needed was they're probably gonna do this they're pregnant find a way to make a I would not be surprised if they find a way to make a cartoon out of and I'll see if I can find this because what they do is snowball is uh there's a cool sequence where it has the appearance of a very graphic style to do something I'm normally impressed by except when they did it here I was like oh yeah a lot of cartoons have done this now it's not even that special anymore oh yeah no a lot of cartoons have done that and it's yeah it's not anything to do that anymore oh yeah I have a clip of it but I do think that that is something that they want to actually at some point but they want to do with that is that they want to actually make a that's the one that want to make a cartoon with that's the one where they going to find a way at some point to actually go in and that they're gonna that's they're gonna be the big toy seller having this rabid dressed up like a superhero superhero is a big right now so this final way to cram that in there and like I said I would not be surprised if like on Nickelodeon or something you're gonna see a cap a captive snowball to the animated cartoon that was not only that feel lazy but it felt like a strict marketing move on there yeah however throughout the movie man I think even with the even with that third one I don't like they're there moments where you just you get a genuine laugh maybe the third one is the one when you get the lease but there's uh they're moments worth it I completely laughed out loud based on what I thought would just be kind of obvious animal humor yeah but it ended up being really funny man there was a there was that scene in the vet where you saw all the animals having like it was almost like they were going to therapy they all had some kind of they're like some some mental issue like they was stressed or they had like issues with their self-image and that wouldn't uh are they were just crazy you know and I got a good laugh out of this particular scene right here it's by human that's not bringing her dead but she throws it out I bring him a dead mouse right now garbage there were parts where is like alright some of this we're gonna like Taylor towards maybe older kids and then there's gonna be a part where we're just doing this strictly for the small children and and I did hear small children and join that still that doesn't excuse it for just throwing it together yeah but but I you know I I don't think I like the last move as much as you did but I did like it and and in this one I enjoyed and that's that's the biggest thing that I think was kind of just when I said this is when these animals are they are everywhere the movies everywhere man yeah because I think that's one of the things that was not handled well with heaviness going three different directions I love the idea of all these animals having their own separate adventures sure and then coming back together at the end of my thing I love that concept also even though that last thing got together back together for the dumbest part of the movie but I think that they have different tones while I'm telling you that one was for like smaller kids they had some that were for way older kids to the point where it was leaning towards adult which I appreciate I just don't think it all went together very well like they had that joke where Chloe Chloe whose voice my leg bell uh-huh when Gidget do did Gidget Jenny slate yeah Kingsland when doing Gidget goes to talk to uh goes to talk to Chloe about hey train now to be a cat so I can infiltrate got this ball they'd even trying to hide Chloe's hi why is there a lampshade on your head my owner might have given me a little bit of Katniss okay gotcha come back and find that cat overdose but they'd even try to make like they didn't try to cover it up anything I I like that I just did I thought MIT wow there's some parts today even there's even now point where this is a kid's film and that look I ain't you know I didn't like clutch my pearls like oh I'm so offended but there was I was kind of taking it back in one the dog said see now you're mad I'm pissed off and I'm like oh my god you doing kids move you know ya I never think of that as being a something you you know a taboo to say until somebody points it out and I'm like oh yeah that's right I like to prod the idea more than execution of it but if I wasn't getting consistent laughs all the way through and not just throw away chuckles but moments where they actually were I mean it's so they're throw so many again random jokes out there that some of them might not connect to anything but still got it I still had fun with that still got a good laugh I art direction is great I've always liked the art direction of these I've always liked our direction of you know ever since the first one I like this whole thing that they've done you know the whole pastel colored New York goes well I've always liked to love the designs of the animals I think from illumination this is this series is where they've had some of the strongest character design that is definitely true yeah so I you know this there is more that I like about this film that I don't and I'm still trying to weigh whether you know I like this more than the first or not our red is right down you know think that kind of just dead even how'd you feel about it look I know you really liked that last one yeah yeah it's not just that I like that one but it's it's the the one illumination movie that I've liked because rather than illumination with all their their despicable means and minions related movies and even sing they they cheap out not so much in the animation but they cheap out in the story and that they go for the cute they know hey listen this is what appeals to the the most common denominator the masses we got these cute minions grew has cute little kids we got cute animals singing and the secret life of pets the first one that was the first time they win it really focused on the character and his story and making it one cohesive story following these guys and m-max and Dukes had so much personality marry all the characters have personality mhm and everything I could see was like man they really spent their time making sure all this worked and had a flow and came back together and and meant something and I really dug that and it's you know I was and it makes me sad that that that's still the only illumination movie that I like because this one I mean I you're right there are there's there's plenty of chuckle moments in here or even laugh-out-loud moments primarily in that second story with the one with uh we gotta get it yeah yeah that that's where the funniest stuff comes from mostly from stuff that the secondary characters are doing little gags on his on the side some places where the animators had fun the the the Vette scene with the with the other crazy animals that's where the fun stuff came from but the overall story stories not so much they were they honestly they all felt to me as if they had plan to do a regular series with these mm-hmm and then canceled it but it had three stories written and said well you know what we can put these together in one movie because they they beaten because none of the three are enough to be a movie in themselves but they are plenty for a 30 minute cartoon yeah and it just felt like it was stitched where they were forcing them to all work together as one story and and by the end you know the thing that they all come together on is the one that was the weakest the one that was most relied on physical gags I mean yeah so much of this with this this whole movie relied more on physical gags that it did on on writing and character and it was a letdown for me and it actually kind of it's funny cuz it bored me but it was making me laugh also so I was getting my laughs in but the same time whenever it wasn't making me laugh I was just like man it's a Snoozeville okay I would give it a very high rental because like I said it reminds me of something I would watch on television yeah yeah I'm gonna go with a matinee man made me happy even I couldn't even get mad at cat the snowball man he was getting on my nerves I did nothing I didn't like see I didn't like that I didn't like that rabbit from the from the first movie you know it's a funny thing with the first one I was like this rabbit should be annoying me and yet somehow he's just enough to where I'm getting into it I see his purpose here and it's working for me and it is funny to have the cute little rabbit who's so loud but everybody else is kind of blowing him off I tell you what made it for me there was one thing that Kevin Hart did with this that I thought was funny this lucky you say little touches with the wood that the animators had are even though touches that they have with you know that even the editor hat made with the vote maybe with the voice work I love that little scene where Kevin Hart runs down the hallway he looks out from the coral a bye-bye okay I got to get to do to get stuff to do things you know things like that made me laugh man I like that I actually snowball for the most part didn't even ask captain snowball he wasn't annoying me all that much until the in scene where he decided to come back and be mr. hip-hop out of nowhere like the movie was done it's it's like it's it's over he goes like oh hold up pull up because we're illumination and we know what the kids like we're gonna have the cute care to come back and be hardcore he's rapping now for no goddamn reason this rabbit picks up a baseball cap puts it to the side and just stars rapping for no reason it's almost there we got a black dude doing the voice he got a rap yeah I got two Ed's in the Contra and was and was terrible it was panda Panda panda Panda man the panda bears like this one even this is not related to anything nothing it was done fucking song that they're mimicking is old this ain't he the hip-hop had nothing to do with this shit except that the kids liked it he found up somewhere I found off he robbed something gang somebody the gap for the gold chain probably Elvis yeah it's like there's no reason for this at all except that you you got to leave the kids dance in the aisles on the way uh yeah I but that's at the very end and if I had not been right now on my lonesome whatever I would have been out and had even seen him so so I'm not gonna hold that against I was almost I was almost out cuz that's at the very end it'll air man I got a choice to leave hey other people are not gonna leave they gonna go oh what's this part I can tune it out that at that point I can edit is the end it's not integral to the story it's not any goal but you know it's there you can't you can't edit it out now this not for me I know you trying to sway me but I said whenever it and whenever you go to watch this again or it comes on and you start watching it you are not gonna pull out before that part I will you will not I will you will not I will goddamnit I will I got it if I got throw a brick at that goddamn TV I will I gotta jump to the no they oh oh predictable illumination but you know what and I'm not bullshitting you could ask Kirk or this is the people work to screening you gonna ask Kirk or Chris next time you see him there was a there was a they let the kids fill out the form sometime and there was a little girl next to me how mom was was asking her she's helping to fill it out put your name there now circle that you're a girl circle girl now say what they want to know what's your favorite part of the movie because you know we fill out a different form and the little girl said I like it when the rabbit was rapping okay you know an illumination I'm not even defending it that's their thing quick spoiler it's quick spot gonna support everything but they have a third one where the rabbit comes back in the transvestite or even maybe just trance I'm being serious just see you'll see the boy he might come back as trance for the next one just watch and see what I'm saying I would now I would love that they actually set that up for him to be trans bunny no exact it pop thing was it going hey just so y'all know I'm a real thanks for getting to the end of the video look I know you got things to do but can I get you to hit that subscribe button right there and if it's not too much to ask just one more thing check out our main site double O sitcom over there you'll find the long-form versions of this video along with lashings of the new album every night of the week supporters that he team are calm remember to always stay toasty

29 thoughts on “THE SECRET LIFE OF PETS 2 MOVIE REVIEW – Double Toasted Reviews

  1. Hmmph!! Those who know, know that 'Hoodwinked!' is Pulp Fiction for talking pets (one overarching story from various view points and all) ?

  2. Who thought replacing Louie C.K with Patton Oswell would some how be less controversial? … I think Patton has Done abs said way worse things in his personal life than Louie.

  3. Kevin's in the weakest segment makes it official.
    Kevin Hart is cinematic poison.
    Stand up…great
    Talk show guest… wonderful
    Movies…Nah!

  4. At what point will people stop passing judgment on Louis C.K and just let the man be? The didn't have to replace him.

  5. Spoiler: Max is actually dead. He “went to the farm”, so to speak.
    Harrison Ford is the Guardian Dog Angel.

  6. Watching the NBA finals getting bombarded by commercials for this shitty movi. Never going to watch this trash

  7. You know how many dog puns I've made in my life?? ONE!!! I got slapped, walked backwards for a week, but I never made another pun again.. it was a dog-gone learning experience.

  8. Patton felt wayyy out of place compared to Louie. Louie's voice matched the character. Oswalt would have been a better Duke, actually.

  9. I Liked Louis CK As Max’s Voice Because If The Snarky Type Voice He Has. They Could Have Replace Him With Robert Downey Jr. or Ryan Reynolds

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