Gary and item Talk Dogs Episode 10 – Do what you’ve always done, get what you’ve always got.

we’re back hello hello Gary yeah hello
everybody hello everyone we are live and I have a crazy hot spot on my face
I’m just light that’s all right mm-hmm but if the Sun came up today that’s the
most important thing how’s everybody doing trying to find the comments and I
never know how to turn the comments on Artem I mean we’ve been doing this how
many weeks now it’ll turn from generate I guess only six months it’s like
learning curve as powerful as my uncle used to say so Artem we’ve done this is
our tenth episode which is amazing yeah thank you for showing up every week I
know it’s tough it’s late where you are so that’s really awesome so we wanted to
today take a look I was calling it like our flashback episode not that we’re
going to go through all the topics but talk about our approach to solve problem
solving yeah the problem solving exactly so one of the things we had talked about
is we want to create a new way to look at the dog and human relationship and we
want to reverse engineer the miscommunications that people are having
with their dogs and start with what the problem is and how it came about not
just let’s go in and how to solve it because you know we’ll talk about why we
do this and I know it’s counterintuitive from a lot of the way trainers work
they’ll go in and you know they hear the clients talk and then I feel like a lot
of them you know have a very similar treatment plan all the time you know
which is dog training sittings you know that kind of thing and
we look at more of the environmental piece of it and that’s what I think I am
daily routine like daily routine not only those pieces when you doing
something specific with your dog or not only those moments when you seeing behavior
that you don’t want to see your dog like what do you do with your dog in daily
basis before something happening yeah and that’s where the layers you want to
solve yeah and that’s where the lasting
results to me come really understanding how you got into this situation so we
talked about this from the beginning Artem is we didn’t want to do a typical
advice show you know my like do this do that that yeah yeah my dog jumps my dog bolts
out the door the walks are unenjoyable away steal stuff door charging when the
boogeyman is out there all of those things I from it from my perspective I
don’t feel like and maybe I’m just terrible I don’t feel like I can give
honest advice if I don’t know all of the pieces yeah and it’s the more I’ve been
doing it I know you’ve you know this you know you feel the same way it’s easy to
stop the behavior but to have it last is the tricky part yeah you know how to get
a dog to stop jumping is not hard but if you really want it to last yeah if you
really want it to last we have to figure out why does your dog jump in the figure
again yeah all questions should be not how to stop but why that dog is jumping
mm-hmm so if we will figure out why that dog is jumping so it’s almost like
actually the problem is almost done because we know why yeah because we know
root reason yeah and a lot of times you don’t even have to do anything
or if you do all of those things yeah you don’t have to do anything it’s more
about stopping doing things and if you do have to do something it’s not often
it shouldn’t be a lot so I’ll ask you this question do you find that most
problems are actually that you hit me clearly because I do carry yeah hear me
clearly because I haven’t that message that connection is not good no I can
hear you okay yeah so I’ll just repeat that again do you
find most problems and for owners or actually that moment that they’re
suffering from them or is it things don’t know exactly don’t know so and
it’s actually like like with us like having too much weight is not about that
burger that I’m eating right now it’s about how how I am eating in general how
how many physical activities I have or maybe do not have it’s like about it
health if I’m having a problem it’s not about I’m feeling pain so it means that
it appears just now it can be problem of many years before we’ve been like
illness can be a problem with like calculation of all that happened before
you started to feel that pain so same with dogs do you think the people that
you work with do you do they prioritize a healthy environment no no or they just
want to know because most of them not not even thinking about that most of
that most of people and we just talked about it before we started they focused
on to do something to the dog to start out doing this or to start doing
something and I guess in general a lot of people have that idea because
how society how to say it in English like because of ideas that society have
for dogs like dog training dog training is mostly about doing something to the
dog it’s not good or bad I’m not talking about in those terms
it’s just how that thinking appears in owners head
this is what I’m trying to explain so most people they take in dogs
something started happening that they don’t want to and then they okay so I
should train my dog but that especially if if if it is a puppy and it was no
problems for some period of time and then problem problems appeared it’s not
it is 100 percent that is not because you didn’t train your dog it’s because
something happened between you and your dog in surrounding when which dog believes
something happened before daily happening yeah you get no absolutely
absolutely yeah like I and that’s the thing I like we were talking about
before we started that’s the that’s the thing we’re trying to get people to
change I mean for me when you say dog training that means I’m forcing my dog
to understand my thinking instead of me looking at my animal and saying why are
you having those feelings because it’s like my friend Roberta said we talked
about it last week animals have the ability to make choices you know they
might not be making the choice you want but doesn’t mean that it’s not valuable
to them I mean there’s something that there yeah for some reason they’re
making that choice and that’s what I’m passionate about is for us setting up
the proper environment for those things to change
not just getting the behavior to stop because
as we all know once I mean anybody that’s gone through this you know they
stopped some type of habit whatever it is stress that stress will
come out somewhere else so somebody stopped smoking they stopped drinking
they stopped a lot of times they gained weight you know there’s something that
when we don’t deal with the root cause I stop smoking last summer and I gained
III have more weight now yeah yeah ten kilos plus yeah and it’s a lot of
people like that I mean and that’s you know what we’re trying to do is not you
know try to talk more about that environment and figuring out where these
and.and you and I I mean we always kind of say these things like we don’t want
to call them problems we don’t want to I mean and I always try to like tap dance
and get real specific about it or try to get specific about the words but you
know the behaviors that when we’re not on the same page my dog is doing
something I don’t like and you know from the dog side you’re probably doing
something your dog doesn’t like and that’s why they’re doing their behavior
so definitely for me prioritizing a healthy environment is it’s a great
start to at least getting your dog back to neutral like you said the puppy you
know the puppy didn’t come with a lot of these problems I think puppies didn’t
come with leash aggression yeah you know it’s not like oh we’re we’re breeding
for leash aggression unless you get a German Shepherd that’s you know they are
bred for frustration because it’s the sport they’re bred for is you know
barking and frustration and helps with training but I mean I don’t I don’t know
a lot of dogs that are I can’t think of any I’m just trying to not be that all
all in but I guess I don’t know anybody that’s breeding for a leash aggression
do you think it’s fair as owners to expect your dog to change when you have
it no and it’s not fair to anybody like in the relationships with humans like
you need to change so if we have relationships is always about to
mm-hmm and with other humans we can have something equal but there is no equality
here like dogs I’m speaking about not hierarchy right now I’m speaking about
they depend on us every second mm-hmm so how they what kind of experience they
will have about the world depends on us mostly yeah so and of course that is not
fair to expect them to change in much change in yourself yeah that’s what it’s
what I like my pet peeves is when people are just like we had talked about you
know in the previous episodes like toys and things when somebody wants to use an
electric collar to teach their dog to recall when they’re the ones that keep
throwing a ball away from them yes oh you want me to so you want me to shock
your dog because you’re the one that keeps teaching them to run away from you
like not to me isn’t fair so when we’re aware of and no matter
actually no matter too little be absolutely it doesn’t matter yeah long
line I can’t on some dogs I can open umbrella and they don’t want pull as
hard yeah but it’s not about opening umbrella 1 million times from your dog
do you doing things that there’s still things that making that dog
zone you want it or not this is where biggest part lying on yeah yeah it’s
just it’s a shame you know that’s but again I mean that’s why we’re doing the
shows because it’s something we’re both passionate about so I really wish people
would understand that you know most most dogs are suffering from a human problem
and we have to be the ones we’re the ones representing the problem so we have
to be very careful how we help solve the problem
from and that thing that we discussed few years ago like if you still thinking
in a way what to do with the dog what I should do when Dog doing that if you
still thinking as an owner in those terms that’s saying that you not how to
say don’t have information the most important information about why you have
that like when you will figure out why you have that what to do will be way
more easier so if you still thinking in terms of what to and I be in there like
what to do what to do what and that what to do can be countless right when I
found reasons why that why that happening this is when problems really
stopped disappear because I know why something what to do sometimes it’s even
like obvious you don’t need any seen what’s what you need to do just to do
that white dog that I have right now with me she’s you know you know about
her mm-hmm so like few days ago I walked with her off leash and she she she been
thinking was very hard for her because she hyper simulated by everything
especially sounds and before I had a collar on her and she been running as
hell away from me and that e-collar didn’t help nothing didn’t help recalls
nothing so she she came in somewhere they’re not with me and
two days ago she been mentally with me when she be off leash so it’s not about
what to do it’s about like and I actually will tell because she so fast
on leash when she been outside with the own or she always been on leash and
that year that she’s with us she spent most of her time off leash so she
learned how to balance herself yeah and she learned how to he listened to me and
how to be attentive to me when she is off leash yeah so then I dropped that
leash when we’ve been outside in Park and she been thinking not because because
not not because what I did in that exact moment but actually given her
opportunity to be off leash a Lot helped her so much yeah so it’s not
about it’s been not about action that I did in the moment it was about
understanding what’s happening with her being only for her means frustration
stress that dog needed to be off leash a lot of time yeah meant to spend a lot of
time off leash so I’m done yeah and I just had met with someone that follows
us a big supporter of our show and in Virginia woman named Michelle and we
spent a couple hours together in Virginia she wanted to get together and
I was driving through from North Carolina to see my family in New Jersey
and she said can we stop and you know have lunch or whatever so we met in the
park for a couple hours and just talked and I can’t remember I I mean it was at
least like three or four times where I heard her head was just like holy you
know like oh my god it’s so easy like it is really easy what
you really think about the bigger picture and not just like how do I stop
this problem you know how do I stop this problem it she was just like oh my god
yes like that’s so simple because it is it is really simple it’s just not easy
because we we have so much other information out there that’s you know
teaching us to just start doing things instead of looking at the you know the
bigger picture of like you know like we were saying with this dog it’s the day
in and day out minute by minute not just that moment that you brought out and had
a sort of practice and recall what do you ever say just though I feel loved
what I want okay my friend Peters gonna be so happy how much you’re talking
today he keeps telling me get Artem talking more he messaged me after the
last episode he’s in Canada is that Peter yeah yeah oh my god he’s
so fine Peter hey he talks so I and when we’re trying to help solve once we
understand what’s happening like we had you had said this I think somebody had
asked the question about I think it was a few episodes ago about like your go-to
strategy for solving yeah of your problems right yeah I love the way you
put it and you said that I want to clear the dog I should have a clear
expectation of what I want and I think that was a great way to put it so I
always you know do you when you go into these clients homes like I am do you
feel like the things they’re doing every day is moving them in the direction they
need to go no no opposite direction yeah almost
always yeah yeah it’s so interesting yeah yeah and you if you first time
watching us all those things we discuss and nine nine previous episodes yeah
yeah cuz I like what I was kind of thinking about while I was you know
after you said that it was kind of like like the military they spend so much
time practicing certain certain skill sets and situations and possible
outcomes to different situations and there is an expectation the the person
that’s the the hierarchy sets up everybody for success showed them how to
use their their their weapons teaches them how to stand teaches them the
language that they’re going to be using hand signals like all of these different
things and I I just I really want to just get that into people’s heads how
important it is for us to be that I mean that words thrown around a lot leader
whatever but I think it’s just an educator of you know teaching the way
the student learns they have to you have to think like a dog I thought we can
also teach them the way we teach them the skills that we need and that’s what
was interesting when I was with Michelle and she’s like it just was like oh man
yeah that would make so much sense to a dog and I mean I felt that way when I
start you know like I know you did too when we started watching Brandon stuff
you’re just like yes why was I working so hard my teaching
that dog How in a place for example yeah whatever I just like yeah that’s
why for months it’s the problem didn’t go away sometimes it gets worse yeah and
because you know to me like leadership isn’t a title it’s you know it’s it’s
action and example it’s the things we’re doing you know we can’t expend if we if
we fly off the deep end we can’t expect our dogs to be the stoic being when
their example is to get riled up at somebody it’s like our friend Kimberly
when that woman she was walking her dog with a muzzle on and the woman started
like dreaming into her like um do you know that term like I’ll just say it a
different way like Kimberly had a muzzle on Gemma and
the woman started like yelling at her and saying all of those things and
Kimberly wanted to explode at the woman but she’s like what am i teaching my dog
right I’m teaching my dog that same thing to just wow like so she caught
herself in that moment I thought that was real you know that was a real a real
leader setting an example and teaching a skill set anything to add you a comfortable man
look at you so Artem I like this to get something
different you have to do something different mm-hmm yes yes sometimes where
to start and go watch previous episodes yeah that’s kind of and reward them yeah
because that’s kind of out to the brand Brandon’s channel yeah watch I was
saying that you can find the law like universe of information actually what
would I I think one of the things I I’m gonna say this differently I just caught
myself one of the things I would love for people that just become more aware
of is where they’re putting on blinders because of things that they like so a
lot of times people are looking aren’t even looking or giving the possibility
of something in their relationship with their dog because they need it so bad
yes like are they we’re talking about the toys the personal space all of the
things that we talked about in the previous episodes you and I who are
completely unbiased trying to do the best thing we can are going into
people’s homes and we just after a while you can’t ignore the dots that are
connecting you know you go into ten people their homes they’re all doing the
same thing and they all get the same problem and I think that’s a big piece
of this responsibility is being able to you know shelf the fact that I like
doing this yet it could be my problem and I think
that’s a huge place for people to start is to really take the blinders off and
give everything to just observe everything that they’re doing and the
possibility of something that even if it’s love even if it’s best intentions
even if it’s great marketing from Petsmart or other trainers that to keep
an open mind that something there could possibly be a problem how do you feel
about that yeah absolutely agree yeah and you know like when I talk with
people some things they’re so obvious they just actually know those things but
they don’t want to see them because they’re agenda towards the dog this
whole different thing like like for example if like if owner communicating
with the dog in a classic way with a lot of affection
and silly things doing a lot of silly things with the dog and then having that
affectionate weak silly relationships that only want to control aggressive
behavior on walks so it’s obvious who you are for your dog like if you have
these relationships how you expect your dog believe in you when that problem
happening on walks when your dog lunging at somebody because you always showing
about yourself to things like behave silly with me like
I am reason why you so excited don’t take me serious but than listen to so
it’s obvious yeah seems like that there’s so obvious and that and that’s
where for me like what I say to people is I’ve never seen a dog die from not
playing with a toy I’ve never seen a dog die from lack of affection I’ve never
seen a dog die because you’re more accountable for your emotions but I’d
let’s let’s call it not affection but touch is physical cash because
affection yeah yeah a lot of meanings yeah so the physical touch the talking
to your dog all of those things I’ve never met a dog that just laid down and
died because they weren’t getting touched enough and but if we’re willing
if we’re just willing to try what do we lose your dog’s not going to hate you
your dog is not going to I mean it’s the possibilities the upside is so big and
that’s what I think I want people to understand like these you know these
episodes that we make we’re trying to get people to to see a different way
because it’s the way of what what dogs need and not just what we need and yeah
I just think it’s so powerful and so respected yeah respectful to them as in
one episode I said like so what kind of friendship we have with the only
fulfilling our own needs yeah but we call them Friends best man
best man’s friend yeah yeah yeah man’s best friend man’s best friend but are we
a dog’s best friend that’s why I had seen that I actually wrote that down for
an Instagram post later you know they’re man’s best friend but
are we our dog’s best friend you know are we that are we listening to them
when they need us right are we loving them the way they want to be loved which
is the way they want to be loved not what we need because like we said you
know we pull them out of the shelter we have an expectation they don’t yeah they
just want to be a dog what’s up yeah yeah yeah it’s really simple just
thinking and it’s all about understand under standing like if we don’t have
understanding in relationships those relations will be disaster no matter
with whom we are in relationships with the dark if you do know if we do not
understand what they really need in that relationships if we will be in
relationships with the horse we do not understand that horse but we keeping it
so I guess what we also will have problems and the same when we have
relationships with other people if we do not understand another person relationships are not good yeah
and something like problems start happening mm-hmm even aggression between
people yeah so because of misunderstanding each other that’s that
yeah so let’s talk about some of these solutions we’re getting right towards
the end right now so one of the things I think a lot of people make an error in
my opinion is they’re always trying to solve the behavior problem that they see
when it’s happening and they’re not prioritizing the rest of the time that
creates that behavior yes so you know your dog lunges on the walk and so many
people are trying to fix it while they’re all out on the walk not even
considering that the activities while they’re not
on the walk or contributing to that behavior so that’s just one of those
things I want people from my perspective an early Gary’s final thoughts is to
really understand it’s not about now do you have to do something in that moment
absolutely I get that but you might have that problem only because we’re not
willing to look at the rest of the day and say this is causing that problem and that’s just you know that’s just my
experience and dogs are physical creatures and you know if you were in
the middle of a fight Artem you’re a big dude I’m not gonna try to stop you
while you’re in the middle of the fight right I’m gonna try to stop you before
the fight okay I’m gonna say hey Artem this might not be a good idea but
if you’re already in the heat of the battle it’s it’s not going to be the
time to say hey Artem can I talk to you for a moment maybe you shouldn’t get
into you know into a disagreement with this individual right now it’s not the
time but you know we could talk about a lot of other things you know I saw
people it’s like reading a self-help book while you’re having the problem
instead of having the information ahead of time like oh hold on I’m feeling
insecure and then you open your book and then you’re like trying to read it right
now like no like you read the book ahead of time so then when you’re in that
moment you have a better you know the ability to control what’s happening yes
can you share some examples like I thought this was a powerful thing cuz we
you and I both are lucky enough you have Camila and I have Jake and you know
we’re around a lot of other dogs but these are dogs that we share a lot of
time with a lot of life with can you share some examples of how Camila through not just that moment throughout
the day helps other dogs understand how they should behave around her yeah
exactly so you know so if Camila was out on a walk she wouldn’t have these
problems you know is there what are some things that you see that she does and I’m trying to think how to say it in
English she’s definitely very consistent and the univocal and everything by the
way interesting interesting thing about her that she asking a little bit more
respect than other dogs towards her personal space and she’s very respectful
to other dogs personals she never do and on stupid shit towards other dogs never
yeah like like for no reason doing something physical towards other dog
never yeah so she had and she also asking that from other dogs to in a
daily basis yeah like somebody for example Berma our second dog husky
she coming towards her trying to make her play she just bought her Berma and
husky lying down it just happened it’s just in my story today on Instagram she
then she that husky Berma she just okay
and she gets soft but it was not something big happening it wasn’t
something be happen just simple interaction yeah it wasn’t something
like fight or flight situation something simple and she liked what she want what
she don’t like and what kind of expectations she have yeah and she also
as I said respectful to other does yeah in a simple small situation she’s shown
who she’s I would say like that mmm-hmm yeah like I I for me I see a lot of
basic things like if when you know it’s like you’re talking about with your
other dogs if one of the dogs is depending on Which dog it
is if they’re laying down and he just walks up and starts to smell them
sometimes they’ll move for no reason right just because they’re just not sure
if he wants to lay there or what it is so he just does basic things and his
intention is just to me is just to say I can and they they smell him too it’s not
that but there’s that difference in what their brain is doing what you’re saying
there’s a change in the way they that the other dogs feel when yeah when
Camila does things I mean it happens out on a walk sometimes too if one of the
dogs is smelling something and then Jake decides to walk up and smell the same
thing sometimes they stay there and they smell together but then other times the
other the other dog will walk away and just be like oh I’ll just go on to the
next thing they don’t take it personal and but it’s not you know it’s not when
an actual problem is arising so if you know somebody barks and then Jake walks
up to say hey what is it the other dog will back off and say oh he’s here let
me let me you know let me somebody that’s more capable of handling the
problem as is here and I see it a lot with like dog bowls too again he’s not
doing it on purpose if somebody’s drinking from a bowl and he walks up to
start drinking – he doesn’t want them to move but he just doesn’t expect that
they’re not gonna move and they might keep drinking together he’s not looking
to claim the water bowl but sometimes they’ll just be like I’m not thirsty
right now and he’ll just keep drinking he’s just like you know just his
presence can just makes makes other dogs very thoughtful and it’s something you
know you said it’s that consistency he doesn’t know it’s you know that thing is
very powerful that you said like in our relationship warm how to say it what
your how to say it like about presence that that’s that’s that’s everything
actually like your presence what your presence saying to your dog yeah
automatically this is very powerful yeah I have a quote that I created one day
when we were at daycare because Teresa she walked up to the gate and as soon as
she walked up toward the gate her dog had another thought and I say
your presence should change your dog’s preferences yes when you when you’re in
your when you’re in the middle of what’s happening your dog should be thinking
about that yes saying like what is my like you said
what is my expectation right now should I be moving away should I be here
not just what they want to do hi Teresa yes so yeah it’s very it’s very
important is watching yeah yes of course she’s watching
hi Teresa so again we wanted to keep it short today we wanted we have I think a
great topic for the following the following week do you want to do you
want to do the muzzle topic I think you and you into that for the next one
because I think a lot of people well I think a lot of people not just why
people use them but I also think as a society we need to change the way they
think about them so I think there’s a lot that both of us have experienced
wise because we take dogs out with muzzles and we hear all kinds of crazy
shit from people then then you should create go to you set earlier
international muzzled exactly right let’s start the dialogue yeah so yeah
that well you know well back to I guess not our regularly scheduled topics but I
think today it was just we’ve been covering a lot of environmental big
picture things and I just want people to for me personally I just want people to
understand we’re not trying to avoid you know like the question like why you know
like somebody had asked last week like why does you know my dog steals my socks
what do I do and your answer was great was why does your dog take something
that belongs to you right I mean yeah I leave stuff around my house all the time
and this is what’s describes your quote like your presence not because something
happening now but just your presence telling to your dog she can
grab your thing yeah so what kind of things you have in daily basis in your
relationships what do you do with your doubt that that dog feeling like that
around you like oh I can grab ya all right it’s that time it’s going up Artem’s final thoughts anything you want to close with besides
go watch the previous episodes stop doing things just this is best what to
do advice again I guess can be yeah like learn what you need to stop do yeah
that’s a good quote learn what you need to stop doing yeah yeah and then then
you will be then you will be able to move forward for sure yeah yeah it’s
like when I go to show like I’ve been though a few shelters and rescues and
I’ll be in the next nine weeks I’ll be in more and I did that’s what I feel
a lot of is they just work so hard because they don’t realize what they
should not be doing come steal that quote from you I’ll give you credit
always but that’s a great that’s a great that’s a great quote man I mean cuz it
is there’s a lot of what people are doing that they don’t have to and would
make their jobs easier and also when they actually do things correctly it
makes it stick more by the way just what remember something we had conversation
with Kimberly about that white dog that I mentioned earlier today and we talked
a little bit back and forth about her off leash experience and I start to hear
that with her doing less gave more results because I because right now I
know in general at least like the main things I know about her yeah so right
now I’m doing less than for example three years ago
when I met her and she definitely have some some type of genetic problem yeah
but with the with does sing in here oh if I know why something’s happening with
her so severely like she had panic attacks on walks so just like when I
figure out why after that I started doing less and I get more results yeah
it’s kind of like dating like you got you go out on dates and you figure out
like you know what yeah what’s the relationship like minutes yes you know
so awesome my friend I think I think that’s a yeah I think that’s a good
little recap of the last ten episodes I really yeah I feel good about this doing
less which I know sounds odd because people just want to do do do to solve
the problem yeah if you have a problem and you continue to do you don’t know if
what you’re doing is what caused your problem so there’s really nothing to
lose yes and backing it by stopping a few things I will be traveling the next
two weeks I know you already know this Artem so I will be traveling the next
two weeks so we’re gonna have to postpone the show one week so we’ll say
let me see right now it’s so many text messages in the last two minutes will be
so today is the 19 in 19th yeah so we will be back in the 19th I will be in
Santa Barbara watching my friends dogs so I’m sure I’ll have a lot of new
stories for that and awesome my friend well you have a wonderful evening and I
will thank you I’ll talk to you later you have I’m going talking late okay say
bye bye yeah bye everybody thanks thank you

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